Ever looked at others and wondered where does all that confidence come from?
If you have then it may surprise you to know that the lack of confidence is more common than you think. Follow these easy steps to raising your confidence level.
My journey to adulthood had always been plagued with self esteem issues which had manifested itself in me believing unconsciously that everyone did things better than me and without realising it I simply thought I wasn’t good enough. I suppose this believe stems back to my childhood feeling of displacement of being raised by my father instead of having the presence of my mother. Lack of confidence can manifest its self in negative self harming ways not so visible to the naked eye. For instance I grew up being extremely harsh on myself when I made simple mistakes. These mistakes could range from something as simple as making a tea or coffee too strong for a friend or guest where I would would negatively speak to myself in harsh tone telling myself how stupid I was. How many of us can relate with this? Here are some small and easy steps to help get your confidence in first gear!
Recognise that you are unique and your imperfections are a part of your greatness! Even if born as a twin, your DNA makes you an individual. Our flaws are human nature no matter how clumsy you maybe. Do not hate your imperfections but rather utilise them to create a better unique you.
Speak with kindness to yourself the same way you treat others. Often, lack of confidence will cause you to praise and raise others before yourself as if other people do not have flaws. You must shake that false precepts because everyone under the sun comes with flaws and some are just better at hiding them. Learn to talk to yourself with appreciation and celebrate your efforts more than the actual goals you achieve. Talking to yourself in a positive light will heighten your confidence level.
In extreme cases when your extremely down, take a deep breath and a long to short stroll outside and regather your faults and think back to step two. Mistakes are a natural part of life and how we learn from them is what makes us who we are. Focus on being a beautiful soul and appreciate your own personal journey. You are unique and do not need to measure yourself by other peoples standards. Only focus at doing the best you can in your own personal lane. Compete only with yourself and congratulate yourself for the efforts you have made.
Conquer the the nerves by remembering that nobody is perfect and we are all just doing the best we can. Often our nerves comes from an inner believe that others are watching us to see us to fail when in truth most people are too consumed with their own life struggles to be focused on you as an individual.
Finally learn to laugh with yourself. I say with yourself and not at yourself because it’s progress when recognise that it’s all never that serious. Look at yourself with a playful manner and laugh at your actions and forgive yourself.
Confidence is not only about being the loudest and boldest in a room. celebrate inwards and know your worth and simply let others take the spotlight when your in a situation when someone seems seems to be outwardly more outspoken or loud. Never compete in such cases because your personal value speaks volume even when silent and often when someone is determined to compete for attention, it usually means there is a lack of confidence deep inside themselves. Allow them to take the spotlight and even assist them with their insecurities and you will realise your own growth. One awaking moment for me was an incident at the airport when I was asked to fill in a form and in this incident I remember handing the form over and apologising for my poor writing to the clerk and she responded. ‘You have no idea some of the writing I’ve seen” and in a nutshell, she was simply saying my handwriting was far better than some she had witnessed. Lack of confidence manifest itself in the small things we do which is why training the mind to speak kindly to yourself is the biggest step to building up esteem. For extra bonus let your outfit do the talking. Confidence is not just how we act or verbally say. How we dress can be all the voice we need! Be kind, be patient and show love for yourself and yours flaws and you will win and light up any
